Musings of a college graduate

My last day at the YWCA was on Friday. It was one of those bittersweet changes. It was necessary but I felt somewhat uneasy about the change. I’ve never been good with change. Change makes me feel out of control and I’m a very “controlled” person. However, as I was finishing up on Friday, I knew I was successful in everything I wanted to do with the program. I knew I put my whole being into providing the children a program in which they were able to relax, have fun and just be kids. I didn’t need any gimmicks - no silly names for groups, no false pretenses. I was just honest and upfront with them. I didn’t treat the children like victims, but survivors - heroes. The children I’ve worked with have been difficult but then I had those gems, the children who were just innately good, well-behaved and wanted the best out of life. It was working at the YWCA that made me realize how resilient children actually were. It was a concept I had read about in my Child Development classes but seeing it in person made me truly understand what I had learned. Now I’m moving on to the Armed Services YMCA and with me I am taking drive, my dedication to the “cause”, and an understanding of how children work, how they think and that no matter what, be it family separation, divorce, domestic violence, children will overcome if we help and allow them and that’s what makes them so amazing.

On Friday, I was called back for a second interview. I was a little upset because I was telling my friend the day before how much I dislike second interviews. Second interviews mean panels, panels mean future coworkers who don’t have any supervision over me. Basically, it’s a popularity contest. Anyway, putting all that aside - the second interview consists of creating a lesson plan proposal. I have to create a curriculum for a skill building class based on the topic of “differences”. I mean, when I read the email my heart literally dropped. Differences can be interpreted in so many ways. What do they mean by DIFFERENCES?! Like, how am I suppose to deliver this topic without shoving differences in the face of 8 and 9 year olds? All week I’ve been thinking and typing and searching. My brain hurts. I am just so upset over this. I guess I’m more upset because I really want this job and I really want to win this popularity contest. I’m trying to make my lesson plan fool proof. I want to have the answers for the “what ifs” because let’s face it, if there is no loose end then it’s a great lesson plan. “What if the children don’t have a best friend?” Answer: “Then I will ask them to write what their ideal best friend would be like - differences and similarities.” Ahhh… then the art activity threw me for a loop. I thought a puzzle would be a great art activity but then I tried cutting out puzzle pieces and I was thinking about what kid would want to sit and cut cut cut these little humps and bumps for 15 minutes. I had to figure out a new activity and I just can’t think because NOTHING is good enough. Nothing is making sense. It’s not coming together for me and I’m a little worried to say the least.

Well, I woke up in time for my interview. I was up at 5am, out of the house by 6:45am and arrived at 7:20am. I decided to get a venti green tea lemonade and focus on my interview. I was glad when it was happening and even more happy when it was over. Hopefully things work out - I just feel this is the best job for me. IT WAS MADE FOR ME.

I have an interview tomorrow. I’m more nervous that I won’t wake up in time though.

For a while I’ve been thinking about how to get more experience in social services. I knew it would be difficult to find time in my 40 hour work week to volunteer. Until one day it hit me, I just need to ask my supervisor if I would be able to manage a case at work. The kids go to school during the day and although I do my best to find things to do during that time, I thought it would be more beneficial to case manage instead of doing busy work. My supervisor spoke to her supervisor and they gave me the go ahead! Now I am an “unofficial” case manager. I’m working with the single women we serve and I’m really excited to gain more experience and to hopefully point myself in the right direction. Let’s see what happens next.

Today at work, I was providing childcare for the moms as they went to group and I was in charge of about 5 toddlers and other kids. It was awesome, to say the least. One of the kids found an unwrapped Dove chocolate in the couch. First of all, gross. He showed me the chocolate, “Look what I found in the couch!!”, and there wasn’t a trash can in the room so I told him to put it in his pocket so he could “ask his mom” if he could eat it. Second of all, he was super happy to find it. Later I saw him sucking on something - IT WAS THE CHOCOLATE! I immediately told him to put it back in his pocket… to which, he obliged! Now, I don’t always like to laugh “at” my kids but I couldn’t help it. He was so set on keeping that chocolate that he put it back in his pocket and then started sucking on left over chocolate on his fingers. Third, ew, gross. Then later I noticed the chocolate smudge-mess coming out of his pocket. He did not care at all… and all I was thinking was, “Oh gosh, his mom is going to be soooo mad.”

Fourth, am I horrible for making him keep the chocolate in his pocket?

Wait, I’ll answer that for you. NO, cause he found it fair and square and I was honoring his treasure find. lol